Finding Joy in the Little Things
In our endless pursuit of happiness, we often neglect the little things that bring us joy. This narrative explores my journey toward embracing the present and finding joy in everyday moments.
Written by: Tang Kai Qing Lorraine
“Happiness postponed is happiness lost. Don’t wait for something better in the future before you let yourself be happy. Instead, learn to be happy now. ” When my mother said that to me, I couldn’t help but raise my eyebrows at her statement. For as long as I can remember, “I’ll be happy when…” has been a quote I frequently used throughout my teenage years.
“I’ll be happy when I hop on the plane for my graduation trip.”
“I’ll be happy when I land my dream course.”
“I’ll be happy when…”
Unbeknownst to me, I had fallen victim to the ‘I’ll be happy when’ syndrome, constantly waiting to reach my final destination of happiness that seemed like an unattainable mirage.
Yet, all that transpires is disappointment.
This cycle of feeling stuck finally came to an end when I stumbled upon a Ted Talk article earlier this year. I found this quote that stuck with me: “Every time we say to ourselves ‘I’ll be happy when…’ what we’re really saying is ‘I can’t be happy now.’”
This made me realise that my mindset was the only thing stopping me from being happy.
It turns out that happiness isn’t an endgame that I can achieve. As long as my happiness is dependent on the accomplishment of goals, I will always feel that something is missing. Rather, being happy is to live in the present, to enjoy the journey.
Redefining Happiness
Recently, I began redefining what happiness meant to me. While it can be viewed as a big achievement, it can also be the little things in our everyday life. To me, it’s moments like watching the sunset and taking a warm bath after a long day. Though these may seem insignificant, taking time to enjoy these things has enabled me to find joy in everyday moments.
Undeniably, learning to do so was a challenge for me as I have been so fixated on the big things, like travelling to new places or pushing my limits in exchange for a desired grade. Hence, I started a gratitude journal, detailing the small daily things I am grateful for. Over time, it has been easier for me to notice the beauty in micro-moments, to be more present in the now and to feel more content in life.
Comparison is the Thief of Joy
With the daily exposure to millions of profiles on social media, it’s hard not to compare myself to others.
This habit has resulted in me focusing on what I lacked instead of what I already have. I was convinced that if I were to gain what others had, I could finally be happy. Feelings of inadequacy and exhaustion consumed me as I continually tried to push myself to achieve bigger and better things.
To halt the comparison habit, one major mindset shift I made was only to compare myself to past versions of myself. This allowed me to celebrate the small wins and progress I have made over time and to focus solely on my own journey while embracing the fact that everyone’s journey is different.
Just like many of you, I am still learning to live a life that is rich in joy. Now, when I catch myself saying “I’ll be happy when…”, I try to envision myself in the future, looking back at this very moment and asking, “How can I use this time better?”
Usually, it’s always “Start being happy with where I am right now.”
